Atropa Belladonna~ Raven (a.k.a. Nightshade)'s Weblog ~
These are the ARCHIVES of June 2004. For more archives, visit the Archives page. For the current Weblog entries, check the Main page.
Atropa Belladonna| Tues, June 29, 2004 (5:35pm) I didn't know Fire Extinguishers came in "Gift Packs." Well, they do. I got a 'Twin Fire Extinguisher Gift Pack' so we'd have one for home, and one for the cabin. I also bought some shelving, and some hardware, and some things, and some stuff. We're gonna have a lot to haul out to the cabin come Friday, but that's okay, 'cuz we're taking two vehicles: One for the kids & me, and one for Shades and our Gear. Accomplishemnt of Yesterday: Finishing my 'De-thistle the back yard' project. Accomplishment of the Day: Buying Weed & Feed, so I can spray the lawn with it tonight and hopefully those stupid thistles won't come back. It's a pain to let the kids play in the yard when they come screaming to me with thistle prickles in their fingers/toes/butts/knees every 10 minutes. Interestingly, Connor only seems to object to the initial poke... once he's not sitting on the thistle anymore, the miniature slivers don't seem to bother him. - - - The Connor Report My Mom took care of Connor & his sister over the weekend, while Shades and I were at the cabin. From her report, things went pretty well. He's still on his Dairy-Free Diet, and appears to be doing well. He used several words for my Mom (I can't remember which ones now, but some were words he's used before, and some were new) and he was practicing his pointing for her: not pointing at anything in specific, but getting his finger into pointing position and aiming it around, as if practicing this new talent. He's done it a few more times for me, too, since we got back home. He's also said 'up' and 'down' for me, in the correct context. Once he even said 'up' unprompted ("Connor, what do you want? Are you in the kitchen because you're hoping for some juice? Can you say 'Juice'?" "Nnngn! UP!" "OH! Of course I'll pick you up, little guy. Great asking!" - that's the most complex conversation we've had, to date, and I'm extremely pleased with it.) One thing which I've been more concerned about recently is Connor's lack of sensitivity to pain. The thistles are a good example. He doesn't like the pain of stepping on them in his bare feet, but it seems to surprise him more than hurt him. He'll burst into tears, but as soon as I come to him, he's feeling better - whether he's gotten off the thistle yet or not. Then there's the little slivers - I had to dig a dozen of them out of his feet and hands today. Not all from the thistles, I think some are from our deck, because they're much longer than thistle barbs. But when I was digging them out with a needle and a pair of forceps, Connor didn't complain nearly as much as you'd expect. He disliked being held still, and was angry that I wouldn't let him play with the needle, but when I pricked him with it a couple of times (drawing blood once, Ouch) there was no particularly strong reaction. "Meh!" or "Gnah!" was all. No tears, no look of shock. I think this lack of proper pain response is also why he will scratch his cheek 'til it bleeds. |
| Mon, June 28, 2004 (12:30am) We're back from the cabin. Shades and I took Jasen with us for the weekend to get some work done on the place, and my Mom watched the older 2 kids. Things went well - the kids love Grandma like crazy, and the baby loved having his parents all to himself for a change (not to mention being cuddled and fondled by various people out by the cabin including his Auntie Jodi, Uncle Damon, and Nikki (Jodi's friend, who is pregnant with her own first child)), and Shades & I loved the amount of work we were able to get done. Among the many things accomplished, we:
Looking forward to Quad War next weekend! |
| Thurs, June 24, 2004 (4:10pm) I just got my Purgatory turn results, and I am in tears. No, I'm not traumatized. My character isn't dead. Things did not go terribly wrong. Or... well... they did go rather differently than Adrian intended, but that's to be expected with him. He screws up all the time. But this time, he screwed up in a new and unexpected way... and I laughed 'til I cried. Adrian accidentally did something he was supposed to do. I'd explain further, but I don't want to give away information to people who might want to find it out in-game. Suffice it to say, Dave and Cam have a twisted sense of humor. Thanks, guys! |
| Wed, June 23, 2004 (7:00pm) The Connor Report - Late Breaking News Last week I spoke with a lady from Elk Island Public Schools (the people who are responsible for distributing PUF dollars here in Sherwood Park) and she said she'd contact me Monday or today about whether we could get Connor a placement in a REACH classroom for September. She was just waiting for a call to see whether the last placement would be needed by Social Services (for a special needs foster child) or not. Since I had not heard back from her, I gave her a call this afternoon. I wasn't expecting to speak with her directly, since I know she only works part-time (much of our communication has been via voice-mail) but I figured I ought to leave her a message and remind her that we still exist. Today, however, she answered the phone in person. YAY! Alas, the REACH placement had been taken by Social Services. Ah, well - we're lucky that our application was processed for this school year, because it means that we can still look for a pre-school placement for Connor and PUF will cover the cost of a teacher's aide assigned directly to Connor, wherever he may go. We discussed this a bit, and the lady recommended I look for a pre-school placement soon as they tend to fill up quickly in Sherwood Park... and Elk Island Public Schools won't send their aides into Edmonton. What's more, she's going on vacation next Friday and won't be back 'til late August, so if I want the paperwork done before late August, I need to find a pre-school real soon. She assured me, however, that Connor's name would be at the top of the waiting-list in case anyone withdrew from the REACH program. Of course, unless that happened in the next week, she'd be on vacation and I wouldn't find out until late August, so I should probably have that pre-school registration worked out for Connor well before then. Right. My mind goes into overdrive as I try to figure out how I might juggle my time next week to arrange for a lot of phone-calling, appointments, and possibly pre-school classroom visits. ("Let's see... I can beg my Mom to take Kalen on these days, and I'll send Jasen to Star's so I can have just Connor with me while I go... no, that won't work. But if the DayHome can take Kalen for a few extra hours on some days and my Mom can take Jasen, then maybe I can put Connor down for early naps and still make appointments for the afternoon... hrm, or maybe I could call my Aunt.. or my Sister-in-Law.. or...") But wait! The phone rings again. It's the lady calling back?!? She tells me that mere seconds after getting off the phone with me, her phone rang again, and it was Social Services calling to say that the Foster Child would be going back to his parents and not need his REACH placement. So they had an opening!!! It's in Ardrossan, but if I wanted to take it, Connor could be officially assigned the placement today. They'd mail me the forms to fill out in the next week, and if I could have them back as soon as possible, all this might be taken care of before anyone goes on Summer Holidays! Yay!! God works in mysterious ways, I know... but I'm glad that this time he didn't procrastinate about it. YAY again! And to make the day feel like even more has been accomplished, I managed to get down to my doctor's office to sign forms for Connor's referral to the Glenrose Hospital, where they do Autism testing. I guess the referral which he was going to make to a pediatrician who knows from Autism (in order that the pediatrician could assess him and refer to the Glenrose if needed) is not going to happen because of the Speech Therapist's report. She said directly in her report that she recommended he be referred for Autism testing. It's nice to know that although my doctor doesn't want to make referrals unnecesarily, he is quick to make them once he has a second opinion from a knowlegeable source. |
| Wed, June 23, 2004 (9:30am) Mmmmmm... watched half a season of Coupling last night, with my favorite Walrus. That was good, and de-stressing... and funny, too. But then, I find British humor much more amusing than most North American stuff - particularly the stuff found in SitComs. Today I'm looking forward to a less stressful day, partly because I slept well last night (relaxed from watching DVDs, in bed before 1am, and then let Shades do the 3am feeding by bottle) and partly because Starlin's coming over to share childcare duties today. She'll be bringing her brood to my place, and I'll take the female half of the population out while she stays in with the boys. Hopefully Jase will sleep while Star does 'Connor-Time'. And hopefully I won't be overwhelmed by 5 girls between 1 & 4 yrs old. Either way, tho, it'll be a change from the usual, and therefore good. Hrm... I had wanted to put something more interesting / exciting / insightful in my weblog today, rather than chronicling the life and times of a housewife. How about we pretend this paragraph details to some humourous incident in the last couple days, hm? Number of emails currently sitting in my inbox: 50 Clearing the mailbox is becoming increasingly difficult, because I'm getting replies to some of the messages I've sent out (go figure) and I'm trying to respond to them as well as older stuff. It's a never-ending loop, I tell you! Aaaahg! - - - The Connor Report The last few days haven't been particularly productive, since Connor's been sick. Then again, a lot of what we do together doesn't seem productive. For example, despite getting him to say 'Juice' numerous times in the last month, he appears to have completely dropped it from his vocabulary again. He'll do something neat one day (nodding his head, or pointing, or playing with his sister) but it won't be repeated. I keep reminding myself that every little connection he makes in his brain - whether repeated or not - is a good thing. Perhaps someday he'll discover the wonders of speech and then all those words I've taught him will come pouring out. Until then, it's a lot of work, with little obvious return. There is a lot of change going on, really, but it's hard for me to see it. Connor is overall more responsive than he was before. He makes better eye-contact, he sometimes turns his head when he hears his name in conversation (showing that he is listening to people around him talking, not just tuning them out all the time) and he's had way fewer tantrums in this last month. I've been doing research, looking for other ways to help him (other than putting Jase & Kale into full-time daycare so I can devote every moment of each day to working with Connor), and am considering the concept of Dietary Intervention. Some people have given me articles on Diet & Autism, others have mentioned TV shows or radio programs they've seen/heard on it and I've come across many websites extensively devoted to the topic. It's a little overwhelming, but with ll the noise, there may be something to it. The basic concept here is that some people believe Autism may have an "allergy" component. Somehow, Autistic kids respond poorly to certain foods or food compounds (specifically gluten and casein), and this can make their Autism worse. Many are reported to improve when these foods are taken out of their diet. Not all Autistics respond to dietary changes, and some respond better than others, but there's enough anecdotal evidence to make me contemplate it. I don't like making sweeping changes, and I'm leary of searching for some 'miracle cure' in a fad diet. Still, it wouldn't be difficult to, say, take Connor off dairy products for a while, and see if it makes a difference. He was avoiding them for the last week while he was sick anyways. If I just don't re-introduce them, will it hurt? I'll need a calcium source for him, obviously. I'll have to find replacements for a couple of his favorite snackfoods. Other than that, it shouldn't be tough. I think I'll give it go, and see what happens: just the dairy-free diet for now. Gluten is a lot harder to work around, and I'm not up to that challenge. Not without more evidence, at least. (BTW, here's a link to an article on Autism & Dietary Intervention. It's just one, and mostly anecdotal, but a google search will bring up plenty more on the topic if you're interested. |
| Mon, June 21, 2004 (6:35pm - updated at midnight) I'm slowly getting better. Kale is definitely doing better. Connor's still quite sick. Life sucks a little less, and yeah, it still goes on. Been clearing out some stuff. The following WhiteWolf sourcebooks are free to (a) good home(s):
(Yes they are mostly old, and outdated, and some of them only have sentimental value to old-school LARPers... but that's why they're free, right? Send me a Comment if you're interested.) Number of emails currently sitting in my inbox: 65 Clearing out email is tough at this point, because most of it requires more than a simple reply. I'm working on stuff like "Oh, a birthday wishlist from my sister! I didn't get her a present yet, did I? Better not delete that email 'til I buy her something. What shall I buy her? (takes an hour and a couple phone calls to decide) Okay. Got it - now I can delete that email." or "Yikes - I've got this package sitting in my basement closet which was supposed to be mailed to someone in the US several years ago. This email is supposed to remind me to do that someday, but it's several years out of date, too. Who do I know that might have up-to-date info? Okay - get info, make contact, make plans to mail out package... but I'd better not delete that email until I know I'm not going to forget this time 'round." or best yet, "Drat... 4 seperate emails from someone who is a very cool friend, and deserves an actual thought-out reply (or four) and my brain is not in a state to think about anything more complex than a bit of HTML code, or how to do up snaps on the baby's diapershirt. I'll have to go to bed on time, get some good sleep, and see if my brain is up to it tomorrow. Or maybe the day after that. Yeah. Sometime soon, at least." - - - The Connor Report Not much to discuss, here. The Con-man's been sick. Connor Time runs just the same - we do what he wants to do. In the last two days, that has been to be carried around, be hugged, and be rocked back and forth. He doesn't want to play with most toys, gets screamingly mad at his puzzles, and will only tolerate a litle bit of action-games (Ring around the Rosy, or Head & Shoulders, Knees & Toes). So I've been developing strong arm muscles, and hopefully Connor's been developing a stronger sense of security. I'm pleased to say that on Sunday, when we had our usual multitude over for Sunday dinner, I expected our sick little boy to flee to his room, but he didn't. He hid under a table, or played in a corner, but he stayed in the same room... and once in a while even snuck glances at what was going on, or came to me for hugs. That's much better than his usual 'sick' behaviour. Still, I hope he gets better soon and we can go back to games and words and sign-language and all that good stuff we've been practicing. |
| Sun, June 20, 2004 (4:25pm) Kids are still sick. I'm still sick. Life goes on. Shades has been getting stuff accomplished today - outdoors stuff, like yard work and building our back sidewalk, and projects like that. Me, I've been trying to clear my inbox again. I did make a psuedo-resolution to clear it, several months ago, and I'd like to get to the end of 2004 without having mail from 2000 still sitting in my inbox, preferably. Number of emails sitting in my inbox at noon: 352 Number of emails currently sitting in my inbox: 70 |
| Sat, June 19, 2004 (11:55pm) It is the middle of the night. Connor is awake and upset - I just gave him Tylenol for his sore throat, but there's nothing I can do for his rasping cough at present. Kalen has a productive cough, at least. But she's also got a nasty wheeze, and we've had her on the nebulizer for ventolin every 4 hours today. She's getting a treatment right now, in fact. In the middle of the night. yep. Jasen is grumpy, and either squirming in my arms or bitching vocally about the shortcomings of my breasts. I am tired, and sick, and sore. And I am very glad I am not in the middle of a farmer's field in rural Saskatchewan right now. |
| Fri, June 18, 2004 (4:35pm) Yes, I meant gigabytes, not kilobytes. Thank you to the people who understood what my sleep-deprived brain was really trying to type. (Ew - that brings to mind images of gooey brains, typing with their dangling tentacle on keyboards, like they do in B-grade movies. Or, uh, something like that.) We're gonna be off to the cabin again tomorrow morning, and back Sunday evening. I hope everyone has an enjoyable weekend. Wish us a sfe drive, and sleeping-at-night children. Here's a quick gem, btw... Kalen: Mommy, may I see your shiny bracelet? Raven (presenting wrist): Certainly. These little stone are diamonds, and those blue ones are called sapphires. Kalen: It's beautiful Mommy. It makes you pretty to wear it. You look like a lady! (sigh) - - - The Connor Report Today I helped Connor play with a new puzzle, which Star had brought him from IKEA - a little wooden house which you can take apart and put back together if you do the pieces in the right order. Connor has the disassembly down pat, and is getting good at reassembling it, too. He also tried to say, "Puzzle" while working on it, though it came out more as "huzzo" - but it was clear what he was talking about. We also wnet through a Dr. Seuss ABC book, and pointed out all the letters and words. He's definitely developing an interest in the alphabet. My Mom took Connor to the playground for an hour or so of playtime, too. He really enjoyed that, and came back thoroughly exhuasted. I'm glad I've been able to get a couple other people (Star, my Mom) to do one-on-one with Connor, because I'd like him to learn to respond to more people than just me. Not that I don't appreciate the fact that he's starting to form attatchments with me, finally (and I think he's very cute when he zeros in on me for hugs and cuddles) but I also want him to recognize that there are lots of cool people around - that socializing is a worthwhile activity in its own right. |
| Thurs, June 17, 2004 (4:40pm) I have a very beautiful bracelet to wear, courtesy of Shades. This is making my day particularly pleasant. I'm even not being too daunted by the fact that tonight will probably have to be spent packing, if we want to take the family out to the cabin again this weekend. Before I do any packing, however, I'm going swordfighting... and then I'm off to BP's where I can show off my new bracelet to various friends. - - - The Connor Report Star came over yesterday to do Connor's play therapy with him, while I took her girls out to the mall. He took about 20 minutes to warm to her (that doesn't surprise me at all) but they did get some good playing in. She taught him how to do 'Itsy Bitsy Spider', which he apparently enjoyed quite a bit, and he even said something which sounded like 'Spider'. I believe he was trying to say it, because he did it again today when I played the game with him. "Spide! Spaduh! Spiduh!" he shouted, when I set him on the bathroom counter in front of the mirror and started singing. Today, we did 'Connor-Time' out at the playground, where we were lucky to find a real live spider scuttling across the sand. I pointed it out to him and he spent 5 minutes chasing it in utter fascination. I repeated the word, "Spider!" to him numerous times, but I'm not sure if he made the connection between the animal he was seeing, and the one in the song. Connor also enjoyed playing in the sand, and we practiced physical skills like scooping sand up with a shovel. Then we climbed on the play structure and went down the big yellow spiral slide. The slide echoed inside (it was one of those plastic tube-things, like some waterslides) and he loved making noises in it, once he got used to the effect. When we reached the bottom, we would clap and shout, "YAY!" and when the Con-Man discovered how well "YAY!" echoed in the tube, he began saying it over and over. By the time we were done, he had his YAY down pat. He would even clap and shout, "YAY!" for other kids coming down the slide! Alas, since coming home, his YAY has reverted to a less intelligible shout of delight again. We'll have to go back and practice more another day. - - - Accomplishments of Yesterday: Finished reading The Curse of Chalion by Lois McMaster Bujold. It was good, and I'm debating whether I should go ahead and buy the sequel in hardcover or wait for it to come out in a more portable format. Probably wait, since I have other stuff to read in the meantime. (Oh - and I discovered that she has a web site: www.dendarii.com). I also finally got a hold of someone at NetNation to discuss the bills I've been getting for extra bandwidth. They've set me up with a different hosting package now, which gives me 10 kilobytes/month of bandwidth. That should take care of the problem for the foreseeable future. |
| Tues, June 15, 2004 (4:40pm) (Happy birthday to someone I know!) Ah, lessee.. I haven't posted in a while 'cuz we were out at the cabin for the weekend, and it's taken a couple days to recover now that we're home again. It was a good trip, though, and we're likely to do it again this coming weekend (with Shades along, this time.) Highlights of the trip include: - not getting stuck on the muddy road through the site (unlike my parents, who had a trailer to tow). - discovering the cabin had weathered the winter well, and that the mess made by a pigeon (who'd chosen to roost on our chandelier) wasn't too bad. Yes, there was pigeon shit on the chandelier and the floor beneath, and a few feathers blown about, but it took les than 15 mins to clean up. No permanent damage done. - Kalen settled for a good nap around 1pm, and got 2 or 3 hours of sleep in the cabin with no complaints. Connor refused to nap on Friday, but despite that stayed in very good spirits and was alert and playful and paying attention to conversations around him. - no one got sunburnt, tho Connor got a kiss of sun on his cheeks. - my Mom was very helpful with the kids (as were other people at the site, including Hjalti, Kat, and Kat's Mom) so I didn't feel like I was a single parent all the time. - Connor dumping a gallon of wash water on the floor, and gigling insanely about it. - my mom's cooking. Always good. - the kids slept better than expected overnight, with only half an hour of crying from Connor to deal with around 3am. - while I was showing Connor the sign for my shop on Merchant's Row ("See, Connor - this says 'Cloaking Devices'. Here's a letter 'A'. This is a 'C'... 'C' is for 'Connor'... and here's a 'K' for 'Kalen', and a 'D', and an 'O', and...") when Connor grinned and said, in a sing-song voice, 'A, B, C, D...' He was singing the Alphabet! I've been singing it with him every morning while I sign the letters with the song, and apparently he's been paying attention! - driving with my brother, and enjoying good conversation on the trip out and back. - arriving home to a clean house, and a husband ready to make dinner for all of us. |
| Fri, June 11, 2004 (3:40pm) It's well after three, and I'm posting to my blog. This means we're not off to the cabin yet. Why, you ask? Simple: Because it's raining. The rain itself hasn't hampered our plans to go out to the cabin. We'll still be going this weekend. But my Dad got the weather report from Saskatchewan (Lloydminster area) and found out its raining worse there... so the farmer's field which passes for our campground is going to be wet. And so will the dirt road into it. Which means we stand a good chance of getting stuck in the mud if we try to go out there today. So, we're gonna wait 'til tomorrow (when the weather is supposed to be a bit better). This kinda screws up my plans, 'cuz I'd wanted to head out around 2 or 3 when the kids went down for their naps - that way they'd sleep in the van on the trip. If we leave tomorrow at, say, 9am, then the kids will be wide awake and wanting to play, and will bitch and cry the entire trip down because they're strapped into carseats. Then, once we're there, they won't nap 'cuz they'll want to play. And when bedtime rolls around, they'll be way overtired, so they won't sleep. And that means Iwon't sleep. And then they'll be hideous and grumpy all Sunday, too. But we don't want to wait til tomorrow afternoon to make the trip down either - we'd lose most of the day getting there and have no time to work/play at the cabins. So I suggested (ick, I can't believe I made this suggestion!) that we go very, very, very early in the morning. Like, be on the road out of town by 7am. This'll mean getting up before 6am, but it'll simply a lot of things because I probably won't have to feed the kids breakfast (they'll be too tired to eat at that hour) and if I throw 'em straight into the van and start driving, they might just sleep part of the way there. When we arrive at the cabins (or maybe even at Lloydminster), we can eat (the kids are used to breakfast between 9 and 10am) and then still have plenty of time for the kids to play and get tired out before naptime. And then, hopefully, they'll have a good evening and sleep well, too. This is the theory, at least. - - - Connor Report Had an appointment with the Speech Therapist today to get an assessment on Connor. The result: She states Connor displays severe receptive and expressive language delays. This may sound somewhat depressing, but it means we'll be able to aply for funding under the PUF program, and should be able to get Connor into a special learning environment this September, whre he can start making up for his delays. The Speech Therapist also suggested we request our physician to refer Connor to the Glenrose for an assessment. Our Doctor was, in fact, planning something like that, but because he doesn't work wih a lot of ASD kids, he wanted the opinion of a Pediatrician who knows from Autism. Now, since we've got the opinion of a Speech Therapist who knows from Autism, he might be willing to get that referral in earlier. |
| Fri, June 11, 2004 (12:10am) Swordfighting Thursday evening was fun. I actually got to the class on time for a change (since I expected I'd duck out early, I figured I should try to catch the beginning at least) and thus was present for the warm-ups, stretching exercises, and drills of various guards and cuts. This left me with a much better idea of what was going on, later in the class. We worked in pairs and practiced certain cuts and defenses (Wow - my shoulder strength has lots of room to improve) and then we had fun parrying longsword blows with a dagger. There's only a few things you can do when you're armed with only a dagger, and the other guy is coming at you with a longsword: Get the hell out of the way, or throw yourself into a parry with hopes of attacking quickly afterwards, or get the hell out of the way and then try a very quick attack afterwards. Basically it amounted to a lot of fast dodging, dashing, and sore arms. It was great. I did get to BP's after the class, and happened upon Tom Cantine who told me a most amusing anecdote about his son. Isaac is in grade one, and sometimes parents or grandparents of the kids come to volunteer for the class. On this particular day, one little girl's grandfather was present. He happens to be an individual of certain political position in the city (His last name being Smith, and first name being Bill). He was present in his role as grandfather, and not as Mayor, but still he gave the kids the chance to ask him a few questions. Six-year olds being what they are, I imagine most of the questions were along the lines of, "What is your favorite color?" or "Are you the guy from the TV?" Isaac, however, had a couple questions of a different sort. His first was, "What Party are you from?" His next question was, "What's your favorite Law?" Isaac has apparently heard his Dad talk about Criminal Law, and Constitutional Law, and Corporate Law, and so on, and thus knows that there are many types of Law which a person can go into. But Mr. Smith was evidently not expecting this sort of question from a 6-yr old, so he answered a little differently. "I think my favorite law is the Smoking Bylaw, which says people can't smoke in public places." Isaac thought about this for a moment, and said, "I concur." The mayor seemed even less prepared to hear that from a 6 year old. He turned to the teacher. "Did he just say what I think he said?" The teacher (who knows Isaac's Dad well from Tom's frequent volunteering with the class) nodded. Yes, folks... that's what you get when intelligent parents raise their kids to be intelligent people too. You flummox the Mayor. - - - The Connor Report: One Month in Review We've been doing one-on-one therapy with Connor for one month, so far. There have been a lot of changes. There's still a long ways to go, however. Here's a few notes: - His eye-contact has improved dramatically. He'll look at me for several seconds at a time. He'll even make brief eye-contact with some strangers. - He actually comes up to me for hugs now, even when not crying or upset. Sometimes he even approaches to grab hands and ask for a game, or get me to follow him somewhere. - He no longer acts like his siblings don't exist. He'll (usually) be careful not to step on Jase when the baby is on the floor, and he often climbs onto the same chair as Kalen to play Lego with her (next to her, really) or see what she's doing. - He still scratches his face raw & bleeding with no apparent regard for the pain. - He will say/sign 2 - 6 words per day. Before this month, he averaged less than a word per day. - He will shake his head no sometimes. He'll nod (infrequently) when prompted to do so (as in, "Connor, do you want some Juice? Nod 'Yes' if you do!") and yesterday he even pointed. - He seems more aware of daily routines, like waiting for his hands to be wiped after a meal (he doesn't always wait before climbing off his chair, but sometimes he does. And when we bring our little escapee back to the table, he often offers his hands for wiping belatedly.) - He seems excited to see certain favorite people (his Grandma, his Uncle Hjalti, etc.) - He sleeps better at night. He has been waking only a couple times per week on average, and settles easier after. (He was waking several times per night for a while, and then took an hour or more to resettle). - I'm enjoying the time I spend around him much more. He's so much more personable than he used to be. - He still likes to run around in circles, or hide under chairs for long stretches, or stare off into space and ignore the world, but I think he does less of that than he did a month ago. |
| Thurs, June 10, 2004 (10:25am) And we're jumping straight into The Connor Report This morning, while playing with a wooden puzzle-game, I was holding a puzzlepiece shaped like a tree, and asked Connor "Where does the tree go?" It's a pretty simple question, because the puzzle has pictures which exactly match the puzzlepieces printed right on board, and besides, the tree was one of only three pieces we hadn't put in yet. Normally at this point, Connor would grab the tree from my hand, and put it in the correct spot. But today, he POINTED! He pointed to the tree's spot! He didn't just grab the piece and play the game, he used non-verbal communication to answer my question. It may sound weird, but he's never pointed before! So there was much rejoicing, and Kalen finished the last two puzzle pieces for Connor while I was throwing him into the air, so I said, "Now let's all go to the kitchen for our morning juice." and Conor's eyes lit up and he shouted "Juice!!" and ran to the kitchen to wait by the fridge. YAY! (He's said Juice before, and knows to go to the kitchen, but it's usually when I'm holding his sippy-cup and pointing at it, repeating the word 'Juice' two dozen times. This time he neatly picked it up out of conversation.) - - - Today is gonna be busy for me. We're headed out to the cabin this weekend (the kids and I) so Shades can have a child-free weekend to do some housework and yardwork. I still have to get the bulk of the packing done, do some more laundry, clean some old cabin stuff, and get it all ready to load into the van tomorrow morning. Depending on the state of my packing, I may or may not make it to BP's this eve. |
| Wed, June 9, 2004 (11:55pm) Stole this Meme off Pixie's page. Her results were more interesting, but I'm geekier! How much of your body is geek friendly? See if you can type your name with your: NOSE: raven ELBOW: raven TONGUE: raven CHIN: raven FEET: raven ONE FINGER WITH EYES CLOSED: raveh BACK OF HAND: raven PALM: raven MOUSE: raven WRIST: rav3wen - - - And now it's time for: The Connor Report Words Connor has said today: Juice, Kay-Kay (meaning Kalen), Byebye, Jase (twice! He said it twice! The first time might have been random burbling (it sounds a bit like 'juice' and a bit like 'chase'), but the second time he was definitely referring to the screaming bundle in my arms) and I think he even said 'thanks' at one point. Or, rather, I always tell him to 'say thanks' after I give him his sippy-cup of juice, and today, as I was passing him his cup, he said 'shangs' in the same tone which I use for saying thanks. Then he patted himself on hte head, which is what I do when I tell him he's a good boy for using a word. He also came up to me and asked for bouncing games, excercise games, and a Zrbbrt today. He's starting to want to play with me. This is good. - - - Accomplishment of the Day: Dealing with a backlog of mail/bills/charity requests which I'd been ignoring for the past few weeks. |
| Tues, June 8, 2004 (1:40pm) Tres cool: A friend (out of the blue) tossed me this link to a picture he made in my honor. Very sweet of him... and I find the pic very flattering too (it's not of me per se. Just inspired by). Let's see... I want to blather about my son now. To facilitate non-kid-wanting-reader's ability to skip these ramblings, I shall set them off from the entry like this so you can read 'em or ignore 'em at your whim. - - - And now it's time for: The Connor Report The Con-Man seems, for all intents and purposes, to be responding well to... uh... whatever it is we're doing for him. Primarily, I've been focusing on one-on-one interaction. We play games like 'Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes', or 'Run Around in Circles til you Fall Down Dizzy (he beats me every time - I have low tolerance for Dizz), or 'Hey Mommy's Making Funny Faces! Look at ME!' or we do puzzles together, or blow bubbles, or read books, or just put on music and dance together (I hug him, and waltz or spin or boogie). When we started this, about 4 weeks ago, we could - on a good day - get him to make eye-contact two or thee times, for a second or so at a time, and sometimes he'd even say or sign a word or two. Now, even on a bad day, I can usually get a word out of him. On a good day, he'll say a couple words, sign a couple words, nod or shake his head, make eye contact for 3- 5 seconds several times in a row (I had up to 10 seconds, once) and he's so much more responsive! He laughs more, and grins, and follows me from room to room - or runs into another room and then checks to see if I'm following - and he seems to genuinely enjoy having me around and interacting with him. (Before, he was quite ambivalent). Today, when we had finished 'Connor-Time', he sat in the kitchen to play on the floor with spoons. I started unloading the dishwasher. He stopped what he was doing, and looked at me. Not just looked in my direction, but at me, at what I was doing. Then he got up, and reached for the top rack of the dishwasher (something he's not really allowed to do, having tried to hang on it before, pulling it off the rails and breaking 2 mugs) and before I could stop him, he reached into the dishwasher, gently took out a mug, and brought it over to me, and put it in my hands. The next mug he got out, he set on the counter next to me so I could put it in the cupboard above. He went and got the next, and emptied 4 or 5 mugs like this, grinning at me and watching for approval (which I gave, liberally). He eventually got bored, or overstimulated by all the praise, and wandered off. But WOW! He's never done that with me before! - - - Accomplishment(s) of Sunday: Tossing May's entries into the archive, and then going through nearly a year's worth of archived entries and sorting them into appropriate year/month links. And I finally sewed summer curtains - white panels of cloth to keep out the sunlight so our house will stay cool(er) despite huge South-facing windows. Accomplishment(s) of Yesterday: Buying a self-lifting drainspout so our rainwater will not have to flow across our sidewalk and wash out the dirt every time we forget to put the spout-extensions down in a rainstorm. Also, filling out Child Tax Credit forms, finally. Note to Self: Remember to mail those off. Accomplishment(s) of the Day: Phoning around re: Early Intervention programs for Connor. Phoning the Church re: RCIA classes (the still have to get back to me). Picking up more Bandaids for Connor, who scratched his cheek open (again). |
| Sun, June 6, 2004 (3:50pm) Ingredients for a good weekend: One Good Friend coming back from Winnipeg (with her cute kids, too) A Handful of comments on how well Connor seems to be responding to home-based therapy Four Hours out of the house on Friday evening, with Wally, to see Troy Two Episodes of Coupling, viewed courtesy of Wally's laptop, late Friday evening Eight Hours of sleep (broken, but I'm not complaining) as Shades let me sleep in on Saturday morning Three Kids who behaved remarkably well during Saturday afternoon Church service One Amazing, Fantastic, Understanding Mother who agreed to babysit the kids overnight on Saturday One Good-looking, Loving, Indescribably Wonderful Boyfriend (gently whipped) Two Tickets for Harry Potter: Prisonner of Azkaban Dinner for Two at Sorrentinos One Night at an Expensive Hotel, brought to affordable rates through industry connections Half an Hour in a Jacuzzi tub for two, in the hotel suite. 60 Minutes of Massage One King-Sized Bed, with no kids asking to snuggle in it, between Mommy and Daddy Eight Hours of glorious uninterupted sleep. Brunch for Two, in the Hotel restaurant Three Smiling Kids to come home to afterwards. |
| Fri, June 4, 2004 (9:40am) Oy vey. I got out to BP's rather late last night, so I didn't get home til much, much later. Still, it was a good time - I ate spicy chicken quesadilla and had good conversation (reminder to self: go see the movie 'SuperSize Me'), and unwound from the stress of the day. By 1:30am I was on my way home. By 2am, as I was approaching our place, I felt unwell. I came in to discover that Shades was still awake (silly boy) and the baby was just ready for his nighttime feeding, which was nice... but I was in no mood to be social or cuddle a baby. I took over a bathroom for a bit, and after that flopped out on the bed to see if my stomach would settle after having divested itself of much quesadilla. It did calm a little, so I took the baby to feed him, and things went okay... for about 10 minutes. After that, my stomach began the worst cramps. I had to very carefully drop the baby on the floor, and then rolled around in pain next to him. I tell you - people should not have to make those sorts of contortions or ghastly noises short of actual labour and delivery. Shades was good and took the baby, and then sat by helplessly as my insides tried to become my outsides. Aaaahg. By 3am, things were pretty much tolerable again. I finished feeding the baby and crawled into bed. 7am, the baby was ready for his morning feeding. So I got up (feeling much better for 4 hours of sleep, however sporadic and unsettled it was) and took care of him. I got back to bed at 7:45, but didn't fall asleep. 8am, Connor woke. So... I got up with him. Kalen was up 15 minutes later, and the day was underway. I'm glad I get to bring Kalen to the Dayhome in another hour, 'cuz I'm not up to handling 3 kids on 4 hours of miserable sleep. Hopefully, Shades will get home early today, and I can ditch all childcare responsibilities on his shoulders, and have a nap before heading out to catch Troy. |
| Thurs, June 3, 2004 (3:00pm) (Okay... long entry. People who have no kids and no desire to read about 'em are welcome to skip this entry in its entirety. It doesn't even have any amusing "kids do the silliest things" anecdotes in it.) I'd mentioned before that I had a Dr.'s appointment for Connor today. Well, we went and talked and the Dr. checked out my two and a half-year old boy... and he said kinda what I expected he would. Connor seems to be autistic. We're not talking full-blown, rocking back-and-forth, extremely developmentally delayed -type autistic. But we're not talking "It's all in your head, you silly neurotic Mom" stuff either. Assuming there's no other reason for his current behaviours (like, perhaps he's barely speaking because he's actually deaf, or maybe he's got developmental problems which are manifesting in bizarre eccentricities) then the doctor says we may well be looking at a kid who is on the Autistic Spectrum. Autistic Spectrum Disorder. Whew. I didn't want to hear it, to be honest... but I'd also kinda come to that conclusion on my own. I've been making a lot of observations about him, and doing a lot of research online, and he really does fit the bill. He's two and a half, and he doesn't talk yet. He doesn't even use pre-linguistic gesturing. He rarely makes eye contact with people. He can (and will, if allowed to) ignore people for long lengths of time, playing by himself in a corner, or hiding under a chair, or stacking blocks in his room. He also doesn't seem to be able to follow simple directions (although he can frequently use environmental cues to figure out what's expected of him). He has also been resistant to physical contact and/or affection, which is very odd for your average toddler. I think that's what first cue'd me in to the fact that we had a problem on our hands. Connor would happily accept hugs when he was crying, or hurt, or woke frightened in the middle of the night... but during the day when he was happy, he was totally ambivalent to hugs, and would even, often, push me away. He never came and sought out love and attention. In fact, when Jase was born and my attention was mostly devoted to a newborn, Kalen got clingy as a 3yr old could be expected to do.. but Connor just drifted away. He would play at spinning a pot lid for nearly an hour at a time, or just lie down under a chair and stare at the bottom of the seat. He spent an entire feeding like that, once: easily 45 minutes of... just nothing. That (as well as having a newborn in the house, and not getting near enough sleep) is what caused me to be extremely stressed over the last couple months. When I started researching online, and figured that our kid might be austistic, I was even more out of sorts, for a while. But I also found, during that research, some suggestions for how to work with autistic kids, some home-based therapies, and tips on encouraging interaction, socialization, and fostering eye contact. So that's what I've been working on, with Connor. For an hour or two, every day, I work with him one-on-one. "Connor-Time" we call it. It's a combination of play therapy, speech therapy, physical contact games, and doing whatever the Con-man seems to want to do. Some days it is very, very high energy (rolling on the floor together, following him around as he runs in circles, or holding his hands and bouncing him up and down, up and down, till your arms turn to jelly) and some days it's low-key (sitting with him in your lap, playing Lego together, or stacking blocks & knocking them over 15 dozen times in a row, or just rocking back and forth in a hug if he's feeling sad) but overall, it's time spent together building emotional bonds, and making him (hopefully) want to interact more with people, cuz people are fun. Since we started this, we've seen a serious change. He's much... happier. He glazes out less often, and he accepts hugs more readily. Sometimes, he even wanders into a room and grabs your legs, which seems to be his way of saying "pick me up, I want a hug". I've been teaching him baby-signs and he'll use them from time to time (signing 'more' for juice, or cheerios, or 'ball' to have me fetch his jingle-ball) tho rarely more than once a day. We've been able to get him to say at least a word a day, and sometimes two or three (juice, bye, night-night! etc.). It's extremely rewarding, but also a lot of work. So... that's why I haven't been answering email, or writing long posts, getting to LRPS meetings, or hanging out after games as much. I've been spending time playing with my kid. Kids, really, 'cuz after a session with Connor, Kalen will still want attention too. And Jasen is getting to be so cute, lately, that I can't resist his little grins. And every now and then, I want to do things like sleep, and eat, and maybe tidy up the house so it doesn't look like a white-trash dwelling. Yeah. That's what I've been up to, lately. Drat, I've gotta go. The baby is waking, and I must go make silly faces and cooing noises for him. He has me in his thrall. |